Yesterday morning I served in the healing rooms at church. We get into groups of two or three and ask the Lord to touch the sick. Some come into receive healing in their hearts as well.
A young man came to our group and as soon as came a heaviness seemed to descend like a cloud that surrounded him. It was clear that he needed freedom more than anything else. I asked him if he wanted to be free, and began to see an inner struggle in his eyes. A battle clearly raged in him. A great call rested on this young man and it was obvious that the enemy was threatened by him. We waited on the Lord and soon after realized that the counseling this man needed were more than we could offer him. We found another lady who specialized in counseling and asked for her assistance. She took him and began to process with him at a deeper level. I felt in over my head with this situation.
As he left us we prayed over him and ourselves, rejecting anyway the enemy wants to bring discouragement, hopelessness, or depression. You don’t often hear stories like this one from people in ministry, yet I think it is important. I feel that I need to be more vulnerable with the moments where I am humbled and feel incapable. The truth of the matter is that He doesn’t give me more than I can handle. But I must be honest sometimes it feels this way.
John Maxwell puts it like this, “If we’re growing, we’re always going to be out of our comfort zone.”
After yesterday morning, I went to the prayer chapel, and just soaked in God’s presence. I sought for the reality of Him to be greater that what felt so real in that ministry time.
The true test came today as the sermon ended and it was time for the ministry team to come forward. I had a choice. I could bask in the failure of yesterday, or I could again chose to step out. Each time it is a risk. Each time there is potential to get in over my head. I chose to step out.
The first lady I prayed for had severe back pain diagnosed in terms I probably couldn’t pronounce let alone spell. So I leave the details of her condition alone. I began to pray inviting the presence of God to come. The pain left her upper back and her legs. Hallelujah! The pain in her lower back still remained. I felt prompted to ask her in anyone had ever measure her legs before. She said no, so I had her sit down and extend her legs. Sure enough, her right leg was about a half an inch shorter. I said one time, “I command this leg to grow out in the name of Jesus.” And faster that I have ever seen that leg just shot out! She jumped from her chair, laughing and dancing. It took a minute for her to calm down enough for me to ask her about the pain. Through laughter and excitement at so clearly seeing God touch her she exclaimed, “it’s gone, the pain is gone!” We thanked God, and I moved on to pray for the next person.
The bottom line here is a lot of stuff is over my head, but ALL things have been placed underneath His feet. (Ephesians 1:22 and Hebrews 2:8)
We never know the breakthrough that lies on the other side of risk. We must step out to increase in grace and anointing. We must fear Him more than failure, for He is greater than any failure.
I pray that today you will step out. I pray that you will get in over your head! I pray that you will see greater breakthroughs in your life than you could of ever dreamed.
One thought on “over my head…”
sooo good, Anna! You’re so right about needing to share the vulnerability and the battles and overcomings of ministry. Thanks for sharing this awesome testimony! =D