I wouldn’t say the new year has had the best start for me. For the first 8 days, I was fighting a sinus infection. We came home from Christmas with colds, the girls and Chuck shook them off pretty quick, but my sinus infection was a bit more stubborn.
This led to a lot of nights with less than ideal sleep. This is not a good for me. I know some people can survive on slivers of sleep, but none of those people live in my house.
I sat down so weary and cranky last night and decided to journal a bit before bed. And to my shock, the Lord started to speak to me about a clean house. He told me that I need to rest more and that a clean house doesn’t represent a happy healthy home. And He brought up the word He’s been bringing up for over a decade – abide.
I come from a family of get it doners. And I really love feeling like my life is ordered and organized (and okay maybe in control). If you want to get cured from that disease, I highly recommend having twins. Because control is no longer an option. It’s been 11 months of letting go… Well really 13 months, because bed rest really limits the ability to keep the house clean and organized. If the house keeper missed a spot vacuuming, I would stare at it day after day until she came the next week. A trip to the bathroom caused contractions, therefore vacuuming would have sent me straight to L&D.
The Lord has been teaching me once again about abiding. It doesn’t mean I don’t clean or cook or do my chores, it means I include Him in every aspect of my life. It doesn’t mean a clean house isn’t nice or even important, it means a clean house is not in anyway a sign of success.
Success looks like abiding.
Success looks like really connecting with my babies.
Success looks like being nice to my husband.
Success looks like a house that’s a refuge from this world.
Success is a house filled to the brim with joy and peace.
I often want a black and white rule book for life. I want it cut and dry, no mystery or challenges. But the problem with that is it cuts Him out of the equation. Abiding in His rest isn’t about everything being perfect, it’s about allowing the Prince of Peace into every mess.
Life is messy and unclear and that’s why we need Him. If it’s too cut and dry, I often begin to function on my own strength. And when I do that, without fail, I end up utterly exhausted because I wasn’t designed to do this life on my own.
Well, I better put in a load of laundry, or have a nap… š
May you enter His rest today!
Love,
Anna